What An Emotional Couple of Days

Yesterday, I went and had my MRI tests. It started out pretty normal. I guess it was normal since I've never had one before. They had me wear the sexy hospital gown but kindly gave me a top and bottoms. (I always feel bad for the people who walk down the hall with their rear on display.) They explained what would happen, asked me to lay down, pushed ear plugs into my ears, strapped my head into that little plastic helmet and secured my face with little pillows on either side over my ears. They explained it was to help minimize my movements and reduce the loud pounding noises I would soon be hearing. Into the tube I went. I closed my eyes and prayed. They assured me things were going well and I doing good holding still. Suddenly the pinging and pounding reminded me of a Star Trek movie and I had a horrible urge to giggle. I couldn't get it out of my head and that bwahaha just wanted to come bursting out. I didn't but oh man was that hard to hold back! Next, they decided they needed to pull me out of the tube to inject the liquid metal into my arm to help them get a better look at my brain. I'm used to needles from all my IVF testing and only asked if the liquid hurt while going in my arm like the dye during a hysterosalpingogram. They assured me it wouldn't hurt at all other than the prick from the needle. Again, I settled into prayer and just breathing. A few minutes in I started feeling my chest start to hurt. The pain got worse and worse until it felt like someone was standing in the center of it. My head started to feel weird then I started to see tons of spots and I couldn't catch my breath. The nurse or radiologist started SCREAMING "DOCTOR! WE NEED A DOCTOR IN HERE NOW! SHE'S HAVING A REACTION!" 3 people came running into the room and I was begging to be allowed to sit up. All of a sudden I felt nauseous and started getting sick (in my mouth.) Thank goodness Starbucks tastes the same the second time around. Finally, someone noticed my hand gestures for a trash can and handed it to me. The flood gates opened and everything came out. I was terrified by the sudden reaction my body had to the injection. In addition, I seriously thought by their reactions that I might die. While working as a social worker in a nursing home I watched a woman have a heart attack and die while spewing projectile vomit across the room. That was the only thing I could think about was that image of her and was that happening to me? Thankfully, that wasn't the case. I asked what was next and the Dr told me they would have to do the rest of the testing with what was already in my system because they couldn't risk how my body would react if given any further injections. Before I was strapped back into the contraption I asked the radiologists, "So, Do I have a brain in there at least?" She looked at me puzzeled but then realized I was trying to laugh at myself and said, "Oh yes! You've got a brain my dear. No need to worry there." I was trying really hard to stay positive y'all! After the procedure was finished the Dr told me I was part of the 1% of people who are allergic to this liquid for MRI testing. OF COURSE I AM! That's Murphy's Law for me. They wouldn't let me go until they checked my BP and made sure I was OK. They also told me they would have the results to my Dr in 2 days. If they founds something was wrong they would contact him sooner. I got to my car and called Bird to tell him I was done and I would be coming to get Yaya so he could return to work. Next I called my mom to tell her we were on our way and what had happened and the reality of what just happened really set in and I started crying and sobbing like a baby. What is it about talking to your mommy that makes you feel safe and like a child all over again? If that weren't enough, last night was Yaya's open house for her preschool. Bird and I couldn't believe we were already attending our baby girl's first Open House. How had that happened so fast? The water works came again as I drove home. I'm so thankful for my daughter, my husband and our family, church and friends! Today, I received a call from the neurology clinic. Turns out the MRI tests came back as normal. God is good! OH MAN IS HE GOOD! I guess, now it's more testing or I'll just have to live with the partial paralysis. I've joked that it'll be my cool party trick. Some people can touch their tongues to their noses. I on the other hand can only move the right side of my face and neck. Again, I'm trying to find humor in this whole scenario. Please stick with me. We also learned some tests my father in law had today came out good which was a huge relief. We're feeling pretty blessed in our little corner of the world tonight. I pray that you and your families feel the same in yours. For those of you looking for a job, waiting for your loved one to heal or even waiting on test results of your own. Please know that I'm praying for you just as you've prayed for me. Thank you so much!