Our Journey to Parenthood Part 2

Over the next 2 years we tried and tried but got nowhere. I bought and took more pregnancy tests than I can count. I wish I had bought stock in them! I'd be a rich woman!!! Anyway, I went to 3 military doctors over a 21/2 year span. The first in Aviano, Italy and two at Nellis AFB in Las Vegas. The Dr. in Aviano checked my blood and told me all was fine. He told me I needed to chart my cycle. I DID THIS. He also asked us questions about how we fit physically and if there were problems there. EXCUSE ME? Can you say humiliating? Not one red flag over my sudden weight gain or discussion of my blood showing signs of Hypothyroidism. I saw the the second doctor about a year later. He was good but he moved a week after our first and only meeting thanks to the good old military. He was the one who FINALLY told me I had a condition called Hypothyroidism. He gave me the option of starting treatment with a medication called synthroid. He also told me I had a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and I should consider taking yet another drug called Clomid to help me regulate my monthly cycle. I decided to try the synthroid medication to treat my thyroid first. I thought if my thyroid started working properly again maybe I wouldn't need fertility treatments. I'm always hopeful but not always successful.

After several more months of trying and failing I returned to the Dr. My 3rd doctor was a real piece of work. During both my visits with him he told me I was too fat to get pregnant. Lose weight, change your diet and you'll get pregnant. Simple as that!!! Mind you, I had been swimming laps, attending yoga, running, lifting weights, eating healthy daily and NOTHING had changed. Sure I had muscle-tone but I could not lose any weight. This JERK DOCTOR summed up all my problems to my weight. I used to be a size 8 but this guy couldn't see that. He only saw the person in front of him. It took everything I had in me to keep from falling apart in his office. I WOULD NOT LET HIM GET THE BEST OF ME! Thankfully the 2nd doctor had made good notes of our discussion and plan of action. I don't think I would have gotten far with the 3rd doctor without his notes. Anyway, I somehow convinced him to start me on Clomid to see what happened. When it didn't work I had to go back to "THE GENIUS" for another visit. This time, my husband came along for support. I WASN'T GOING BACK IN THAT OFFICE ALONE! It was during this trip that we convinced him to refer us off base to an infertility specialist.

Dr. McConnell was her name and she works at Nevada Fertility CARES Wellness Center. We began testing all over again but both of us this time. We learned the same things re. my condition but we also learned Bird had a low sperm count. As if my fertility issues weren't challenge enough. HA! Good gracious I never imagined I would be discussing such things at all let alone on the internet. AACK!!! We listened to her information and all the options before us. We also had to take our finances into consideration as well. FINANCES, a whole other topic in itself. Remind me to tell you our example of how Men are From Mars Women are from Venus in a later post.
Bottom line, the best chance for us to have a baby was to go for the gusto so In Vitro it was. This meant we had chosen the most invasive type of fertility treatment. We followed her instructions to a T and finally it was time to start the treatments. The emotional roller coaster was just getting started.

I was very blessed to have a neighbor who was a nurse. She held my hand the entire time and helped teach me to give myself the shots. She helped me with the first 4 and then watched a few more til I felt comfortable on my own. (I must preface how much I hate shots or having blood drawn. I used to practically pass out at the thought or sight of a needle and here I was giving myself shots 3X's a day and having my blood drawn almost 3 X's a week to monitor my hormone levels.) On top of it I had hot flashes and mood swings from out of this world. Toward the end of my cycle I also began having trouble sleeping due to discomfort caused by the swelling ovaries and eggs in my body. My back hurt almost constantly and w/o a good night's sleep I was a mess. I begged my doctors and nurses to allow me to take Tylenol PM or something so I could function mentally. We also learned my body was slow in responding to the hormones. This meant the eggs didn't grow at the speed they should. Each time I thought I'd hear it's time to take those suckers out they would postpone the date a few more days. I was a wreck! Grow eggs Grow! became the cheer we said throughout the day. This was on top of the unending prayers we said to God.

When the eggs were finally ready the Dr retrieved 8 eggs total. This was a very disappointing number for me but 8 was better than none. Again, we waited until it was time to put them safely back in my body. We started our next cheer and round of prayers. GO SPERM GO!!!

2 or 3 days later it was time to put them back safely inside me. We learned we only had 2 eggs left. Did you know our fertilized eggs have ratings like the ones at the grocery store? Grade A is the best for producing a successful pregnancy. We of course decided to put both of them back in for our best chance. Our newest cheer? Implant Eggs Implant!!! We thought lots of sticky thoughts. My days of bed rest and more waiting began. You too will have to wait and check back tomorrow if you want to hear how it turned out.

By the way...here is a little advice to those offering words of support to someone struggling with infertility. Please please please don't tell them to relax and it will happen. Don't tell them not to think about it and it will happen either. When you are infertile or challenged these words can be soooooo maddening. Forgetting about it isn't an option when your life revolves around it through your diet, your vitamins, your constant shots, trips to the doctor for blood draws and ultrasounds. It's what we would love to do but the one thing that is impossible. Even more important, DO NOT TELL THEM HOW or WHAT THEY SHOULD FEEL. Kiss of death! Instead, tell them you love them. Tell them you'll be over to listen, to allow them to cry to go see a movie, to pray. Send them inspiring scripture or poems that bring hope, whatever. That is the best way you can help them.

Click on the link below if you would like to continue reading about our first adoption journey.

Our Journey to Parenthood Part 3